Monday, 29 March 2010

Prayers, Weigh in, late shift and snow...

This title is probably summarising my day quite well. My main subject of the day will be prayers, My fiance's granny is very ill and in hospital. I found myself praying today because I feel useless and I wish I could do more but I realise there is nothing more for me to do. Praying is a major thing for me, I am not very religious, I don't know what I believe in, the only thing I know is that I believe there is something up there. The first time I prayed was on the operation table just before going to sleep. I was praying the big guy upstairs to let me wake up after the operation. I was so scared of the anesthesia.

Today I prayed because someone I care about does not have a lot of time left on this land. Because she is very dear to the person I care the most about in the world and I hate seeing him sad. I want to make it all better but I can't, there is nothing I can do about it and I hate that. So I prayed, I prayed that things will go for the best whatever the best is in this situation. I just don't want her to suffer so I will let the bug guy decide what the best is. He will know I am sure... People say he is so powerful he would know what is best wouldn't he?

I was working the late shift today, it allowed me to do my exercise before going to work. I don't like the late shift and I knew James was going to the hospital to visit his granny, I wished I could have been there to support him but couldnt. When I came out of work I got absolutely soaked on the way to the train station, it was the closest place for me to run to to get a taxi home. And when I was in the taxi it started snowing... the snow has stopped now but the rain is still there.

I had my weigh in as well this morning. I lost 100g that's all. my dietician says it is normal and to focus on not putting on weight but I find this so frustrating. My first filled has been moved one day forward it is now on monday 12th april. And instead of giving me one then and the second one the week after they will just give me a bigger one at first ,and then the second one a month after. I am now allowed to eat every kind of food. But need to stick to my diet the dietician gave me.

I am sorry this is not a very positive post but I needed to write all this down to let it out. Have a nice week everybody.





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11 comments:

  1. THE DASH!29 March 2010 at 15:40

    Writing down what and how you feel at the time is what this blogging is all about. Not every post is going to be a positive one so don't worry about that :) We are here for you to offer support more than anything.

    The first few months are so hard when newly banded. You're still feeling your way, wanting things to happen fast and often they don't. Try not to get dispirited (so much easier said than done, huh?) and just keep plugging day to day. It's all you can do. If you keep at it, you will have success.

    Sending hopes across the seas that your fiancée is coping ok. It's hard going when someone you love in your life is sick. Just be there for him. It will mean the world to him.

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  2. Joey29 March 2010 at 15:51

    Hi Julie,
    It's good to let it out - that's what this blog is for. Sending you and your family all the good vibes that everything will turn out for the best.

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  3. Bonnie29 March 2010 at 16:38

    I'm sorry to hear about your fiance's grandmother. Hope she gets better soon.

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  4. Jacquie29 March 2010 at 16:52

    I will keep you, your fiance' and his grandmother in my prayers. {{{hugs}}} to you all.

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  5. Theresa29 March 2010 at 17:18

    You are in my thoughts and prayers. Hang in there.

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  6. Anonymous29 March 2010 at 17:31

    We are thinking of you and your fiance, I hope you both have peace at this time.

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  7. Sandy29 March 2010 at 18:00

    Just said a quick prayer. Like you I don't know if or what is out there but it sure helps to know that others are thinking about you. Take care and hope all goes well in the next while. Stay strong. You can do it.

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  8. LDswims29 March 2010 at 18:17

    You and your fiance and family are in my thoughts and prayers through this time. Take care of your fiance and stay strong.

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  9. Kim29 March 2010 at 20:13

    I am so sorry Julie. You, your fiance and family are in my thoughts and prayers.

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  10. Alison30 March 2010 at 06:31

    I'm so sorry about your fiance's Grandmother, hope that she manages to fight back.

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  11. Bianca30 March 2010 at 20:38

    I'll say a prayer as well. Take care.

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